Where's Your Sense of Humor?
by skylight24
Summary: Sam and Dean are at each other's throats and John gets caught in the middle of it. Snap-shot story. Warning: This story contains SPANKING of a minor by a parental figure (CORPORAL PUNISHMENT) and swearing.
1. Chapter 1

Where's Your Sense of Humor?

Warnings: This story contains **Spanking** of minors ( **Corporal Punishment** ) by a parental figure and swearing. If you do not like this type of story please do not read.

* * *

"ENOUGH!" John bellowed his voice echoing through the small motel room.

Both boys stopped tussling and snapped their heads up to look at a very unhappy John Winchester.

"You." John growled pointing at his eldest. "In that corner." Dean scrabbled to get up and obey his dad's order. From the look of it he better do it fast.

"And you." John said pointing at Sam. "In that corner." Gesturing to the corner on the other side of the room.

"Dad Dean was the one…" Sam began to argue, but apparently that was a horrible idea because John was at his side in two long strides grabbing ahold of Sam's arm and swatting his butt a good five times. "Owwww!"

"What did I say?" John growled in Sam's ear. Sam felt his eyes brim with tears and responded only with a whimper. "Go." John ordered letting go of his son's arm and giving his butt one last swat of encouragement in the direction of the corner. Dean in his corner just simply shook his head at his little brother's stupidity. Sam obeyed wiping his eyes with the back of his hand and the other rubbing his bottom.

Once each boy was in their respective corners John trudged into the kitchenette to gab himself a much needed beer. The hunt he was supposed to investigate turned out to be nothing more than teenage kids playing ill-favored pranks on the townspeople. He found out fairly early, in fact he found out in the first 15 minutes of investigating the High School. He caught a teenage boy using fake blood to write haunting messages on the gym walls. That made John's blood boil. Not only because it was a waste of his time and efforts, but there are real dangers out there and John did not appreciate the jokes made about it nor did he find any of it remotely funny. The kid and his buddies scared a lot of people. They scared one older lady, Mrs. Bolton, so bad that she fell down the stairs and broke her arm. Things like that are not funny. Not to John anyway.

John not being in the best of moods when he discovered the real reason behind the scares in the High School gave the boy a piece of his mind. Perhaps he was a bit harsh, but one thing is for sure; he will not be doing it again.

When he arrived home he was met with the unpleasant sight of his two sons having a heated wrestling match shouting at each other; one calling the other a little shit and the other screaming an ear-piercing screech demanding that he deserved it. John had no idea what Dean "deserved" or who started the fight or what happened and personally he did not care. What he wanted was some peace and quiet. He had enough of idiot kids today. The last thing he wanted was to come home see _his_ boys acting up and fighting like toddlers who didn't want to share their toys. He taught them better than that.

He was tired, frustrated and downright grumpy and was in no mood to put up with any of his boy's nonsense. John noticed that Sam and Dean were at each other's throats lately and he knew it was all because of that stupid prank war they were doing. He found most of the pranks to be harmless, but it soon turned into intense disputes. The jokes were starting to get rather cruel and they were getting irritated and angry with each other.

It was only last week when John had to give Dean one hell of a spanking for gluing Sam's ass to the toilet seat. It took him an hour to peal his son's ass off the seat all the while listening to Sam complaining about how much a buttmucher asswipe backstabbing conniving dipshit Dean was and how his life sucks. John definitely understood his boy's vexation, but after the first 10 minutes of non-stop whining it got old really quick. John at some point during that hour of misery told Sam something along the lines of "be quit" and "just because I can't smack your ass now does not mean I will not later." It was an unpleasant experience to all parties concerned; Sam obviously due to his unfortunate predicament, John having to extract his son from the toilet and listen to Sam's complaining and Dean whose ass John busted. John made it admittedly clear that the prank wars ended there. Sam complained about that, apparently not liking that Dean had the last laugh, but John was having none of it. "You both will knock this prank shit off before I knock it off for you. I will beat both your asses until you see sitting as a luxury and that is a promise! Am I understood?" The order was pretty clear and he got two yes sir's, but, Sam and Dean were both very stubborn and willful something that they got from John much to his chagrin.

Once in the kitchen John reached for the fridge handle and opened it to get out a much needed bottle of dark beer.

"Dad!" Dean shouted from the corner.

It was too late. John was immediately met with a rather powerful jet to the face of carbonated Root Beer.

"Son of a…" John stumbled back completely startled almost slipping on the now very wet floor. He held out his hands to steadying himself.

"Bitch!" He bellowed out finishing his thought. He wiped his hand over his soaked face and stared at the fridge in shocked. He saw the two liter Root Beer bottles that were taped to the inside of the fridge angled in an upward position and the string that pulled the caps off. John taking in what was before him started to stiffen and his eyes narrowed snapping his head towards his oldest. Dean who was staring at his dad dumbfounded quickly turned back to the wall.

It was hard to catch John Winchester off guard and surprise him with anything. Dean had always thought it would be a joyous moment when or if he ever had the pleasure of doing so. He had never thought it would be anything like this, but despite his ass being on the line it was utterly satisfying and amusing. He squeezed his lips tightly together trying to stiffen a laugh that was in his throat. He's dad's face was hysterical.

John's face was saturated in sticky soda. Tiny drops of liquid gathered on the ends of his hair and dripped down onto his soaked through plaid shirt that clung to his body. John stared ominously at the back of Dean's head breathing in and out heavily. He clenched his hands into fists feeling his body tense. He was not happy.

John turned back to the fridge and slammed that door shut making Dean and Sam both jump. Dean heard heavy footsteps in his direction.

Oh shit.

Dean sucked in a breath when he heard John's footsteps suddenly stop. A shadow cast over him and clearly heard John's ridged breathes and a faint smell of sugar something he did not associated with his dad very often, but at this moment he could not think about anyone else. Dean's body went stiff and squeezed his eyes shut in anticipation of a swat. After a good long second of nothing Dean opened one eye confused.

His dad couldn't possibly think it was funny.

John suddenly grabbed Dean by the nape of the neck pulling him out of the corner and marching him towards the kitchen area. Dean stumbled over his feet as John was not concerned with guiding his son gently to the crime scene.

Nope he did not find it funny at all.

Once in the kitchen John stopped in front of the big puddle of root beer on the floor. He pushed Dean's neck down with a bit more force making him bend over slightly making sure his son would get a good look at the large puddle on the floor.

"Clean. This. Up." John emphasized each word with a dangerous calmness with a tone that rumbled his vocal cores.

"Yes, sir." Dean said automatically looking at the dark soda that covered the kitchen floor. John let go of Dean's neck allowing him to straighten up.

"I am going to take a shower. By the time I'm finished I want this cleaned up completely and your ass back in that corner...SAMUEL TURN AROUND!" Sam whirled his head back to the wall. How did his dad see him?

John taking in a heated breath continued calmly straining to keep his composure and anger in check. "Both of you will remain in the corner until I say otherwise…"

"But I didn't do…" Sam began to say to the corner.

"SAMUEL ERIC WINCHESTER! Do you want to go over my knee right now?"

Sam jumped and felt his chest tighten. "No, sir."

"Then shut up." John growled his patience all but spent. He turned his attention back to Dean.

"Clean it up." John ordered sharply and did not miss the glint of amusement in his boy's eye as Dean said "yes, sir" and moved to obey.

John stormed off to the bathroom and slammed the door behind him.

Dean went to the linin cabinet where there were extra towels and began to sop up the mess. He got on his hands and knees and began to clean. After a minute Dean felt eyes on him and he looked up to see his brother staring at him from the corner with an unreadable expression. Dean blinked and then slowly a humorous smile began to form on his face. Sam quickly matched it and they both snickered at the whole situation.

They were careful to laugh softly for their dad was just in the bathroom. It was not long before they heard the water running. Dean quickened his pace. His dad does not take long showers.

The whole situation was ironically funny. Sam was the one that was supposed to get a face full of root beer, but it turned out to be the one person that could beat his ass for it. Their dad was never caught off guard; in anyway Sam or Dean tried it, whether it be a surprise scare or a confession of wrong doing he always just seemed to know, but not this time. It was quite a spectacle to see their dad's shocked face covered in soda trying to comprehend what just happened to him.

John let the hot water run down his tired face washing away the dirt, sweat and soda. He growled slightly as he pushed his hair back with his fingers. He loved his boys, but sometimes he had a mind to strangle them. They both were getting to an age where playing with hot wheels was just not enough to keep them entertained. No. His boys apparently needed to find creative ways to prank and humiliate one another to the point where they would lash out and John would have to step in. His boys were smart and inventive in their pranks and John had to admit they were creative. He just wished his boys would take that creative thinking and channel it constructively. He began to feel his temper cool down as he focused on scrubbing his body. John then felt his lips curl up slightly letting out a small snort. He was taken off guard and almost fell on his ass. He must have a been a sight soaked in root beer looking like a kid that had been shot with a squirt gun, no not squirt gun, more like a fire hose. Mary would have laughed. John felt a sudden pain in his heart as he remembered his wife's smile and sweet giggle.

 **Flashback**

Mary let out gasp as she saw John and the two bags of grocery come crashing down onto to the ice-covered driveway. John grunted loudly as his back hit the solid ice. Ow.

Mary busted opened the screen door and came running over to see if he was okay. There was a terrible ice storm for the past week and it had finally let up. John insisted that he go out and grab the groceries.

"Are you okay, sweetie?" She asked looking down at John.

"Mmm" John hummed as he squinted his eyes slightly. It wasn't a soft fall.

Soon Mary started to giggle putting a hand over her mouth and snorting.

John narrowed his eyes playfully with a fake sternness. "You think this is funny, do you? Me falling on my ass?"

"Oh John…" Mary said continuing to laugh. "Where's your sense of humor?"

Mary began to move closer to him when her foot caught on a particularly icy spot and fell.

"Shit." She exclaimed as her bottom hit the hard ice. Her face was all void of the once humorous smile and the laughing had ceased for the moment. She looked around dumfounded.

John began to laugh turning his head slightly towards his wife. Mary gave him a look and scrunched her brows together. It hurt.

John gave his wife a knowing look and gave her a mischievous smile before saying "Oh Mary. Where is your sense of humor?" It wasn't long until that beautiful smile came back on her lips.

"Right here John Winchester." Mary said as she slid over to him giggling with a mischievous smile on her face.

 **End of Flashback**

The memory of Mary was sweet, but very painful and John quickly pushed it out of his mind and focused on the task in front of him; a small defense to his heart that he often used to prevent him from going into a depression. It had been many years since her death, but John's heart was still broken. It was like a deep wound that would never fully heal. He loved that woman. So much. And she had blessed him with two beautiful boys that were in need of his attention. John dried himself off and put on some clean clothes.

 _Those boys better be in the corner_.

Dean was not afraid of his dad. Well…maybe he was, but not in the way that one would fear a criminal or an assailant. His dad was a gruff hard man there was no doubt about that. He was harden by life and driven by grief of losing the love of his life and an uncanny desire for revenge and to protect his children. The only thing Dean really feared was letting his father down along with his little brother and deceased mother. It was a lot of weight put on the 12-year-old's shoulders, but he would bear it. Like all the Winchesters he had a great love for his small family. He was a selfless child. John knew his boy had a selfless heart and John marveled at his son's determination and loving nature which he sadly did not express as often as he should have. Dean was brave, charming and had a smart mouth which often found him in trouble.

John walked out of the bathroom and saw both of his son's noses in their corners. John stared at Dean's back seeing shoulders shaking, undoubtedly laughing silently. His hopes for hiding his amusement were useless. John knew exactly what Dean was doing and shook his head. John was sure it was funny _now_. However, John doubted the humor Dean would see in getting his ass spanked.

Instead of addressing his son's right away John went to the kitchen to get what he wanted since he came home. John was slightly weary about opening the fridge again, but his son was not _that_ stupid. He doubted Dean would dare risking John's wrath on purpose. He swiftly opened the fridge and was gladly met by nothing more than his six pack he bought yesterday. John gabbed a bottle twisted the cap off and took a swing. He closed the fridge door and sat at the kitchen table taking his time as he enjoyed the quiet and the smooth taste of his beer.

John had nearly finished when he noticed his boys beginning to squirm. They were becoming antsy, especially his younger son who never succeeded in being still for very long. Being in the corner was not supposed to be fun, it was a punishment and as a punishment in John's eyes it was not meant to be comfortable. They were to stand straight, toes to the baseboard, nose practically touching the corner and eyes straight ahead. There was no talking, fidgeting or turning around. Hands were to be at their sides so John could see them and prevent fidgeting. Even rubbing after a spanking was not allowed while they were in the corner, arms were to be by your sides. It was a difficult thing to do and John knew that. It took a lot of will power for young boys, but it was doable.

John finished his last swallow of beer and smacked it down on the table, not too hard, but hard enough to be heard. It was an indication that John was ready to deal with his boys now and Sam and Dean hear it loud and clear. John walked over to the coach purposely and took a seat. He leaned his elbows on his knees and let his forearms hang loosely in between.

"Boys! Front and center." John ordered with a full authoritative tone, the military man coming out in his voice.

Sam and Dean gladly got out of the boring corners and went to stand in front of John. Although the wall was rather dull to look at, John's face was not exactly a better sight to see. His face was firm and ridged. He did not look furious like he did after he got pelted by the jet stream of root beer, but his face held a dark shadow and his eyes narrowed in on his sons.

Sam seeing his dad's face immediately began to plead his case. "Dad I didn't do it."

Dean snorted. "No? Why don't you tell him that you called Nancy and told her I am GAY!"

Not but ten minutes before John came home Sam had called Nancy, a girl that Dean had a crush on and told her Dean was gay. Dean was absolutely pissed to say the least. Sam thought it was the perfect way to get Dean back from the toilet seat incident. Apparently, instead it was the perfect way to get Dean pissed and start a fight. That's when their dad showed up.

"You glued my ass to the toilet! You deserved it, you Jerk!" Sam spat bitterly.

"Stop being a little bitch!" Dean shot back.

"ENOUGH!" Both Sam and Dean stopped and looked at their dad.

"Now I have had it with this prank war shit. Didn't I say to end it?" John growled give both his sons a firm glare.

Sam and Dean both looked at each other almost like they were simultaneously recalling John's words. Oh they remembered alright, but at the time, for both boys, it was worth it. Was it worth it now? Sam and Dean were rethinking it. For two little boys who hated spankings they were sure asking for it. "Answer me."

"Yes, sir." Dean said dipping his head down while Sam was sifting nervously looking all over the room, but at John.

"Sam?" John prompted glowering.

"Yes, sir." Sam mumbled.

"And what about that was unclear to you boys? Did you think I said it just to hear myself talk?!" John growled feeling his frustration build up.

"No, sir." The both replied to the floor.

"And what did I say would happen if you didn't knock this shit off?" John asked not particularly caring who answered. He both knew they remembered.

Sam's eyes widened and began to panic. "No! Dad! Dean is the one that glued my ass to the toilet seat. He deserved it! I couldn't just…"

"Yes, you could have, Samuel. I am fully aware of what your brother did and I punished him for it. It is not your job to decide what Dean deserves."

"But he…" John's words seemed to go in one ear and out the other. His youngest just never knew when to stop talking.

"SAMUEL! Do you need help shutting up?"

"No." Sam gritted out. His dad doesn't discuss ever. He just talks and you are supposed to listen and say yes sir. Dean got it, but Sam usually did not.

"Excuse me? No what?" John said in a low warning tone that evidently suggested that Sam was pushing it. _Boy, you better answer me respectfully_.

Sam recognizing the tone and wisely decided to say "No, sir."

"Now. What. Did. I. Say?" John was losing patience.

"That…well…you basically said we would get a spanking." Dean didn't want to say exactly what his dad had said, for some reason, it always sounded worse the way his dad threatened. He wanted to answer his dad promptly mainly for his brother's sake trying to ease the tension so Sam wouldn't just end up over his dad's knee before the actual spanking. It happened quite often.

John looked at his eldest. Yes that was it. A spanking he promised and a spanking they shall receive.

"Basically? There isn't anything "basically" about it, little boy. It was a promise. That I fully intend to keep." John said very firmly as he gave both his boys a look that sent a shiver up their spines. Both of his son's faces went pale and stood before John looking very nervous and uncomfortable.

After letting his sons stew on his words for a few moments. His eyes locked on his eldest giving him a pointed look. "So, Dean, since you had the last laugh so to speak perhaps you should go first." John said lowly as he folded his hand together with his elbows on his knees.

"Oh come on, dad. It wasn't meant for you. How was I supposed to know you would be home so soon? It wasn't my fault." John almost snorted at that. Not his fault? It was completely and undoubtedly his fault. "Dad we promise we will stop the prank wars now. We promise. No more. We didn't mean it." We? John was always amazed at his eldest uncanny ability to snap into big brother mode when they were both about to get it. Dean always seemed to aid his brother when it came to just before the punishment when John had already made up his mind to dish out ass beatings, by that point it was too late anyways. John wished Dean would be the responsible big brother before the mischief started, but it was unlikely and wishful thinking for both his boys were determined, strong-minded and mischievous. Dean was still very much young himself and has already shown ten times more responsibility then the average twelve-year-old. It was hardly fair to expect him to be as mature as an adult would be, but John expected much of Dean and held him accountable.

"Oh you meant it, little boy. In fact, you both were determined to see who could humiliate the other the most. Your motives were malicious and your pranks were mean. I've had enough." John's voice was hard, but it held a strong weight of disappointment in it that both Sam and Dean did not miss.

"Sam. Go to put your nose in that corner and wait your turn." John ordered pointing to the far corner where he was not but a few minutes ago. Sam made a pitiful face dreading going back to the boring wall. He let out a small whimper, but obeyed none the less putting his nose back in the corner to wait for his turn to for his dad to whack his butt.

"Dean. Pants and boxers down." John ordered his eldest wanting to get this over with. Despite John giving his boys a quite a few spankings in their lifetime he disliked doing it each and every time. It hurt him more than his sons would ever believe; perhaps one day they would understand.

"Ohhhh come on dad. Where's your sense of humor?"

That was the wrong thing to say and Dean recognized that immediately when his dad shot up from his seat and with lightening like reflexes undid the button on Dean's jeans grabbed the waist band and with swift accuracy yanked them down to his knees, sat down and jerked his twelve year old over his knee. Dean blinked rapidly trying to comprehend what just happened as his dad adjusted him over his lap. "Daaaaaad" Dean whined feeling his face turn red with embarrassment at his dad's actions. His dad hadn't taken his pants down for him for a spanking since he was seven or eight. John replied with a solid swat to his son's bottom. Dean grunted and jolted forward at the impact.

"You've got nothing to complain about, little boy. You wanted to give me lip and not follow orders. I've got no problem taken your pants down for you."

Dean let out a groan and began to grit his teeth as his dad's hand kept coming down on his exposed backside. Dean always felt he was too old for spankings at age twelve, but his dad didn't and that was all that mattered because what his dad says goes. His dad was not lite with his ass beatings either. They hurt. Over the years Dean found his dad to be very good at almost everything he did. He practiced constantly working determinedly on things that he needed to improve on until he got it down to his satisfaction which was almost always close to perfection in Dean's eyes. He was beginning to think beating his ass was no different, each time he seems to have improved on making it suck worse since the last time Dean's ass met with John's hand. His dad knew his movements, his sounds and his tolerance. It sucked.

He was now wishing he had said yes sir and not asked his dad where his sense of humor was which apparently was nonexistent or just didn't find Dean very funny. Dean hissed as his dad moved his punishing hand to the lower portion of his butt. Dean started to squirm and his eyes were beginning to prickle with unshed tears as sobs escaped his trembling lips. He was trying to hold back like he always did, but like every time before it was proving to be too difficult and the sting was too much.

"Owwww! O-okay dad. Stop. I-I g-get it." Dean sobbed out gripping onto the seat cushion.

"Hummm. You don't think this is funny?" John asked seriously with a tone that rumbled deeply.

"N-no, s-sir." Dean's voice was strained and pitiful his usual smug and carefree self had all disappeared.

"I didn't find getting pelted in the face by root beer to be very funny either." John said deeply scowling.

Dean couldn't help but smile slightly remembering John's priceless face of pure shock. Dean let out an odd sound that John recognized right away as a muffled short of amusement.

John ceased the spanking for a moment pausing resting his stinging palm on his son's heated seat. "Is getting your ass spanked amusing you Dean?" John practically growled as he lifted his leg pushing Dean's ass higher in the air. Dean's eyes widened and swallowed hard as he knew exacting what his dad was going to do. Oops.

John then raised his hand and began to let Dean know that this was no laughing matter.

Dean responded accordingly as John rapidly smacked his tender sit area. Hard. "Ahhhhhhhhh! OWWW! Ow, ow, ow, ow!" John continued convincing Dean smack after smack that none of it was funny anymore.

"You think any of this is funny right now, young man?"

"Nooooooo s-sir. NO!"

"Good! Cause I sure as hell don't think it's funny and I don't hear you laughing anymore either."

Dean was regretting greatly for snorting. Hell he was greatly regretting starting the stupid pranks at all because right now, at this moment, it was NOT worth THIS. Dean's bottom was on fire he could feel the heat radiating off of his backside. It HURT. John continued to spank the small squirming bottom before him. Dean was crying openly now, very sorry and very sore. John believing Dean had learned stopped the spanking and as always put a comforting palm on his back. John looked down at his son's bottom which was a deep red color. It looked to be a well punished backside.

Dean was still crying quite a bit and when he tried to get up John pushed him back down. Dean let out whine. Dean always wanted to speed things up skipping the importance of settling down and John almost always forced Dean to slow down. Once he was down to sobbing softly John grabbed his arm and gently guided his son up who immediately reached down and pulled up his boxers and pants swiftly over his very tender bottom. Dean hissed and gritted his teeth as the fabric skidded over his sore skin. After his dignity was taken care of Dean sniffled and quickly wiped his eyes with the back of his sleeve. John gave Dean a serious look and pointed a finger to the spot directly in front of him. John always liked to have his boy's full attention when he spoke. Dean obeyed and subconsciously reached back giving his bottom a good rub. Once Dean caught John's eye realizing what he was doing stopped. John almost rolled his eyes. Dean always wanted to look tough in front of his dad or anyone for that matter.

"I know your sore, boy. You don't have to play Mr. Tough Guy all the time Dean." John said gently trying to reassure his son that he didn't have to put up such a hard front. He had just been spanked very soundly and was allowed a little vulnerability.

Yet despite what John had said Dean bravely, but not convincingly mumbled out "I'm fine."

"Hummm. That being said you need to keep that mouth under control. You not following orders and talking back to me is not like you, but if you want to test me. That's fine. Just know you will sorely regret it." John warned giving his son a very stern look.

"I'm sorry, dad." Dean mumbled feeling pain in his heart for disappointing his dad.

"I'm sure you are." John rumbled lowly.

"And about the prank wars and the soda thing…it wasn't meant for you."

"Next time you want to pull a prank on your brother or anyone else. Just remember this Dean. If I get caught in one of your idiotic pranks again whether it was intended for me or not, I don't care what it is, your pants are coming down and your bare ass will get spanked with my belt."

Dean gasped slightly at that. He has never been spanked with his dad's belt before bare or covered. That was an incomprehensible horror. His dad's hand hurt enough. A belt? Yeah he is pretty sure that would hurt worse.

John looked at him with the upmost seriousness giving him a firm look. "Are we clear?"

Dean swallowed. "Yes, sir."

John nodded curtly. He rubbed his stinging palm with his calloused fingers. There was a few moments of silence then John looked up at his son who was tentatively touching his aching bottom. John lips curled up slightly. It was astounding how much his boy was a resemblance of his beloved Mary from his green eyes to his dusted lighter hair to his kind heart. _God Mary if you could see him now, darling_. John couldn't help, but beam with pride; John didn't know what he would do without his boy.

"You know your mother asked me that once." John said with a slight smile at his eldest.

Dean scrunched his eyebrows in confusion.

"She asked me where my sense of humor was." John explained.

Dean looked somewhat surprised hearing anything about his mother. His dad didn't like to talk about her too much. Dean knew it made him sad. Dean often was pained by the small memories he had too. He felt a heaviness in his heart; quickly hiding that feeling Dean looked at John accusingly. "Bet she didn't get spanked for it."

John chuckled at Dean's comment. Dean smiled. His goal was to get his dad to laugh hoping it would take away the sadness his dad was feeling as well as his.

John was taking back remembering fondly of his wife and her sense of humor and yes John had spanked her a few times in her life, but not the way Dean was thinking.

When John did not answer for a few long moments, lost in the memories of his wife, Dean was starting to feel nervous. _Husbands don't spank wives? Do they? Like punishing them? No, they don't do that, do they?_

"You didn't dad. Did you?" Dean asked sounding a bit unsure.

Oh John did. John remembered having a bit of fun in the bedroom, but he was not about to tell his twelve year old boy that.

John smiled at his boy. "No, son."

Dean sighed slightly in relief he couldn't imagine his dad spanking his mom for talking back and even still if she did. He felt his dad would be the one in huge trouble afterwards.

John put a hand behind his son's head and pulled him into his chest giving the top of his head a quick kiss. He had to pull the boy down a bit more then he remembered. His son was getting tall. John smiled warmly holding onto his boy for a few more seconds then pulled back before his Dean got a chance to express his thoughts about chick flick moments. However, the embrace was greatly welcomed and Dean needed it more then he cared to admit.

"Alight. I want you in the shower." John said nodding his head towards the bathroom door turning his son around and giving his butt a solid swat. It wasn't hard and normally he wouldn't even flinch, but on his sore bottom that John Winchester inflicted, that was a different story.

Dean spun around and shot an accusing look at his dad. Frowning as he rubbed his tender cheek. John tilted his head to the side slightly raising an eyebrow with a hint of a small smile playing on his lips.

"Where's your sense of humor, Dean?"

Dean's eyes widen dropping his jaw slightly at first. Then Dean rolled his eye playfully. "Right here, dad." Dean said giving a small smile proving to his dad he hadn't lost it.

John shook his head and gave his son a warm-hearted smile. Even though Mary was gone he still got glimpses of her in Dean. There were many moments that Dean brought Mary back, but sadly John didn't notice too often. But this time he did and it warmed his heart with happiness and love for his son. John felt his throat tighten and before this truly turned into a chick flick moment John ordered "Alright son, get your sense of humor in the shower."

"Yes, sir." Dean said grateful he didn't have to go back in the corner while Sam was being spanked. Dean walked stiffly over to the bathroom, but despite his uncomfortable backside he did not miss John's loving tone and soft eyes. Dean smiled; his dad was still proud of him and loved him. Once Dean had shut the bathroom door John turned his head to look at his youngest who was fidgeting in the corner. Best get this over with.

"Alight, Samuel. Out of the corner. Front and Center, boy. Your turn."

The End.


	2. Chapter 2

Sticky Situation

Hi Everyone! Yes it's been awhile and again I apologize for not posting recently, but you'll just have to forgive me on that real life has been getting in the way. For those of you interested in _The Punishment_ story, I am currently working on the next chapter. So hang tight.

This is a story I wrote awhile ago it is based off of what had occurred before what happened in the previous chapter: Where is your sense of Humor?

WARNING: This story contains SPANKING of minors. If this offends you or you do not like, please do NOT read!

* * *

It had been an unusually quiet day for the Winchester family. John had finished a hunt a few days ago and had some time to relax a bit with his boys. He even got a few more hours of sleep then normal and Sam and Dean were quiet for the most part. Of course they had argued about what they were going to watch on TV. They bickered back and forth getting on John's last nerve. It was only when they were playing tug of war with the remote did John step in. A firm command of pick a show or pick a corner got his boys to wisely stop the argument there. After that the boys seemed to settle down. John even had himself a few beers and some time to write in his journal. It was peaceful, quiet and restful day and John was enjoying every minute of it. That was until he came back from the grocery store.

John walked into the small hotel room with a handful of much needed groceries. He saw his eldest sitting on the bed his eyes glued to the TV screen with a rather mischievous smirk on his face. That should have been John's first indication that something was up, but figured Dean was just immersed in the show he was watching. The kid didn't even acknowledging that his father was there with five bags of heavy grocery bags none the less.

 _Kid's brain is going to go to shit_. John thought not liking his son's mindless focus on cartoons. He usually would have them doing some physical training at this time of the day. Yet, today, he figured would be a good day for his boys and himself to rest. But that did not mean he was going to let his son sit on his ass all day.

"Dean!" John said with a raised voice as he put the groceries down on the small table.

"Yes, sir." Dean said automatically jerking his head towards his dad acknowledging him for first time since he came home.

"Get your ass up and help me with the groceries." John said gesturing for Dean to get up.

Dean stiffened a grumble that was sticking in his throat, but wisely said a polite "Yes, sir."

Dean scooted off the bed and started to look through the bags for something he especially wanted.

"Did you get me any pie?" Dean asked with a hopeful excitement in his voice.

"No, son. I got you broccoli."

Dean froze his hand half way in one of the bags. He turned his head slowly to look at his dad with a look of pure horror and betrayal on his face. Dean HATED broccoli and would rather run five miles at five AM then eat just one piece of that dreaded weed cabbage thing. Dean's heart was crushed because what John bought, his sons ate. Food was not wasted and vegetables were eaten. Period.

John raised an amused eyebrow at the look his son was giving him.

"Yes, son. I got you pie. I wouldn't hear the end of it if I hadn't." John mused dryly as he put the milk in the fridge.

Dean breathed a sigh of relief. "Don't scare me like that dad." Dean said holding his chest like he was out of breath.

John knew very well Dean did not like broccoli and although John was strict, he wasn't that cruel. He remembered what it was like being a kid once and had his share of hated vegetables. However, that did not mean Dean was free from all vegetables and if broccoli was served by Bobby or Pastor Jim or anybody else Dean was to keep his opinions about the dreaded vegetable to himself and say thank you and eat every last piece of broccoli on his plate. The tortures of a young twelve-year-old boy.

"It won't kill you Dean." Sam was usually the Drama King, but Dean had his moments.

"I'm a growing boy. I need pie." Dean said with a smile pulling out a small apple pie from the bag.

"You need milk." John said musing to the fact that Dean needed to be a bit more health conscious.

"Well not always, but it does help it wash down."

John rolled his eyes.

 _Smartass_.

Dean has always had a smart comment or wisecrack to make about almost everything while Sam on the other hand had to challenge and dispute everything. Speaking of which….

"Where's Sammy?"

Dean had an odd look on his face in which John couldn't quite read, but it almost looked like he was amused and worried at the same time and it made John feel uneasy. "In the bathroom."

John nodded and looked towards the bathroom door where the light was illuminating under the frame. John could have almost sworn Sam had went to the bathroom before he went to the store. Feeling a bit worried, for Sam had been taking care of business for a while; John's parental instincts kicked in. He walked over to the bathroom door and gave it a brisk nock. "Sammy? You okay kiddo?"

"Go away!" Sam snarled in a rather disrespectful way.

"Excuse me?" John growled not liking his son's tone one bit. "You better check who you're talking to, little boy."

Silence came after that. Perhaps the kid was worried his butt was on the line now. Good. Embarrassed or not, disrespectful is not something you want to be, not in the Winchester household.

John had guested at first that his boy's stomach was upset; now he wasn't so sure about that. Sam's voice was very defiant and downright disrespectful. What could he possibly be doing in there? A few things came to John's mind and none of them were good. John then proceeded to jiggle the nob on the door only to find it locked (obviously).

"Sam? What are you doing in there?" John was waiting for Sam to just tell him his stomach was upset or he wasn't feeling good or hell that he was taking a shit.

 _You better just be taking a shit._

"Dad! Just…go away!" Sam said sounding flustered and irritated.

"Samuel Winchester! If you don't open this door by the time I count to three you're going to be one sorry little boy." John threats were not taken lightly and John was surprised when he was met with silence.

"One." John growled lowly.

More silence. Not even a shuffle towards the door.

"Two."

 _Boy better open this goddamn door._

"GO AWAY!" Sam bellowed out sounding both frustrated and angry.

Now both his boys knew that it was a very bad idea to push their dad too far and it was utter suicide to yell at him. As an ex-marine and well accomplished Hunter John could be a very intimidating man when he was pushed too far. And it was no secret that he had a bit of a temper on him. No one wanted to see John Winchester get angry and his boys were no exception.

So John, thinking the worst lifted his heavy boot and kicked in the door. It swung opened and a few pieces of wood splintered off. The door banged against the sink and flung back to shut, but John stopped it half way. He stepped in the bathroom only to find his son sitting on the toilet with his pants around his ankles looking at him with a shocked fearful face.

Oh.

John was rather stunned after everything sunk in he began to feel a bit embarrassed and sorry for barging in on his son once he realized he was just simply doing his business. Why didn't he just say that?

"Jesus Samuel. Why didn't you just tell me? I wouldn't have kicked the god damn door in if you would have just told me you were taking a shit." John tried to explain feeling frustrated by his son's lack of communication skills at this moment which would have spared him from busting down the door and thinking something was really wrong.

Sam's face turned crimson red as he hung his head down letting his long hair cover his face. "I'm…I'm not."

John looked at his son dumbfounded. "Excuse me? Then what the hell are you doing on the god damn toilet?"

There was no response. Sam simply kept his head down hiding his face behind his hair.

John was confused and was getting irritated. "You gonna answer me, boy?"

After a long moment Sam mumbled lowly. "I can't get up."

"What?"

"I'm stuck." He said miserably.

"To the toilet?" John questioned in disbelief.

"Yes!" Sam insisted turning to his dad looking like the world had just ended.

"How the hell did you get stuck to the toilet?"

Sam's brows knitted together and gave his father an infuriated look like he had just blamed him for the situation he was in. It wasn't long until it struck John and a whole new wave of annoyance came over him.

"DEAN ERIC WINCHESTER! FRONT AND CENTER!" John bellowed making Sam jump at his dad's sudden booming voice.

It wasn't long until Dean arrived at the bathroom door trying to look as innocent as possible which only irritated John even more.

"You want to explain to me how your brother got stuck to the toilet?" John growled through gritted teeth pointing in the direction of his youngest trying desperately to keep his angry under control. Dean began to open his mouth to speak, but he was immediately cut off.

"You, Asswipe, are so dead." Sam shouted from the toilet pointing a threating finger at Dean looking red with fury.

Dean almost snorted at seeing his brother try to be intimidating while stuck to the toilet. To Dean it looked more like a pouty kid arguing that he could go in the big boy potty. It was hard to look menacing with one's pants around their ankles in such a vulnerable state, not to mention embarrassing.

Dean trying to keep a straight face raised an eye brow. "Oh yeah? Come at me little brother."

Sam let out a growl that sounded a little bit more like a shriek of frustration giving his brother a look that he hoped would kill.

"Are you really _that_ stuck?" He giggled putting a hand over his mouth. Dean was surprised his brother was having that much trouble getting unstuck.

"I am not amused, young man. Not. One. Bit." John graveled lowly crossing his arms over his broad chest looking down at Dean with a dark look. Dean smile faltered immediately and slowly with hesitation looked up at his dad's scowling face. Oh, he looks pissed. Dean swallowed hard.

"You know not to lie to me, boy. Now what did you do?" Dean stared up at his dad not saying anything perhaps trying to take in how angry he looked which was a mistake.

After a moment John grabbed his arm and jerked him to the side and smack his palm down hard a good four times on his son's jean covered bottom. Dean grunted as he felt his backside sting from his dad's hard hand. His jeans offered no protection. Those swats he was given were _hard_. His dad was not happy. John jerked him back to face him.

"I asked you a question and you damn well know I expect an answer." John said tightening his hold on the boy's arm and giving him a small shake.

Dean feeling the heat on his bottom looked at the threshold between the bathroom and bedroom and mumbled out "I…I put glue on the seat."

"Glue? What kind of glue did you use?" John pressed.

"The one that was in your bag." Dean muttered knowing to answer right away this time. He did not want any more swats. He knew he was gonna get it.

"What? Are you serious?" John was completely taken back by his son's stupidity. And this was all supposed to be a joke?

"Did you at any point stop and think…no of course you didn't think! Now I have to peel your brother's ass off that goddamn toilet seat! You think we are going to have fun?"

Dean tried, he really tired not to snort, but he just couldn't help himself. He found the situation still greatly amusing despite the sting in his backside. He thought Sam's stubborn refusal to admit he got stuck and the look on his face was priceless. In a way he did feel a twinge of guilt due to the fact he thought Sam would be able to get unstuck fairly quickly, but apparently that didn't happen. What type of glue was that anyway?

"Oh you think this is funny now? Just wait till my hand comes down on your ass young man. You will not be laughing." John's voice dropped to a deeper level sounding rather scary to the twelve year old looking up at him. John couldn't believe how stupid, careless and rather cruel his son was being. And John planned on having a very serious discussion with the boy about cruel pranks.

"Go on find yourself a corner. Now." John ordered with a harsh edge to his voice pointing towards the bedroom area.

Dean quickly ran to obey and it was a lucky thing he did because John would have accepted nothing less and had every intention of swatting his son's mischievous little butt all the way to the corner.

Once John saw Dean's nose planted in the far corner of the room John turned his attention to his youngest who had his famous pout on that would put most five year olds to shame. John did not look at that as a very admirable talent, but he could not deny his son was good at it.

"Go away dad." Sam said feeling embarrassed his cheeks flushing red looking downright miserable.

John raised an eye brow of disbelief. "You want to stay stuck to the toilet?"

"No." Sam almost growled at the stupid question.

John studied his son sternly for a few moments before speaking. "How did this happen?"

Sam snapped his head to look at his dad in disbelief. "You heard Dean he put fuc-freaking glue on the toilet seat!"

"How did you not noticed it?" John asked puzzled.

Sam mouth fell open and gave his father an annoyed look. _He thinks it is all MY fault because I didn't notice there was glue on the seat?_

John was a very obstruent and thorough person and had been desperately trying to teach his sons to be as well. John was preparing them for Hunts and dangers in the world of the supernatural. He wanted them to be aware of dangers and not fall into situations that would get them hurt or kill due to their lack of observation. It was not that John blamed Sam for being stuck to the toilet seat or that he really meant it the way it came out. Ever since he was brutally introduced to the supernatural his mind was constantly on training and survival. Therefore, his first thought was how Sam could have avoided it. However, Sam did not see it that way. He never saw it that way and only thought that is dad was being an asshole.

"Oh I don't know dad, maybe because I don't do a detailed inspection of the toilet seat before I take a shit!" That being said he imagined he would be checking the toilet each time from now on.

"Watch it, boy." John warned lowly.

Sam taking the warning lowered his head feeling very defenseless and vulnerable wisely apologized quickly. He was angry and didn't mean to snap. "I'm sorry just…I'm stuck."

John sighed heavily feeling rather sorry for his son. "Well here let's…" John started to advance towards Sam. Sam immediately cupped his hands over his private area tried to twist away from John, but for very obvious reasons wasn't very successful. John rolled his eyes at his son's dramatics.

"You got nothing I haven't seen before kiddo." John said as he kneeled down in front of his son and carefully began prying the skin slowly off the seat.

Sam hissed as the tender skin of his backside was being pulled from the prosocline seat. As Sam felt the sting of the situation he began feeling very angry at the person responsible for his predicament.

"Dad he's adopted he has to be, that's the only explanation. He's a freaking lunatic. I'm going to put glue in his shoes, hair and maybe even on his precious stupid magazines. See how he likes it." Sam stated angrily. He was having a fierce desire to get his brother back for this evil prank.

John stopped and looked up into Sam's eyes giving him a warning look. This was not going to continue. "You will not."

"But Dad he is a butmuncher asswhipe backstabbing conniving jerk! And he deserves it." Sam spat angrily.

"Samuel, stop. I will deal with Dean." John said continuing to peel his son from the seat little by little.

"He glued my ass to the toilet seat Dad! What would you do?" Sam asked trying to get his dad to see reason.

"I would burn him new asshole." John said in a very matter of fact manner.

Sam opened his mouth to say something, but John cut him off anticipating the response.

"And no you cannot spank Dean, so don't ask."

"This fucking sucks." Sam hissed with his teeth clinched both in anger and pain.

John's head snapped up in both surprise and anger. "Samuel Winchester! Stop with the cussing right now." John was trying to cut him some slack due to his situation, but John was getting annoyed really quickly. So much for a nice quiet day.

"Well it does and it's all because I have an Asshat for a brother." Sam said crossing his arms over his chest looking stubbornly away from his dad's piercing gaze.

"Samuel! You want your mouth washed out? Because I can stop right now and take care of that mouth for you if you can't. Do you need help controlling that mouth?" His dad's version of "help" was a very contradictory to the word itself. It was never really a gentle nudge in the right direction it was more painful, embarrassing or uncomfortable reminder to do as he says and be polite about it. It was hard for Sam to do that more often then he'd care to admit.

"No, sir." Sam gritted not feeling particularly happy about anything at the moment.

"Good." John had hoped he had ended the argument.

That hope did not last long.

"Dad you know Dean swears all the time and you don't say anything to him." Sam argued unable to keep his mouth shut.

"Stop complaining, Samuel." John wanted to tell him how untrue his statement was, but he didn't want to argue with him. The situation already sucked there is no need to make it any more miserable then it already was. All he needed was to get Sam started on a path where he would just piss him off.

"Well you do and I think I should be allowed because I'm the one stuck to this goddam toilet seat!"

John looked up into his boy's eyes with a dark scowl plastered on his face.

"Samuel." John growled in a low voice. "Stop complaining. I know you are stuck to the toilet seat and yes it sucks, but I am trying to get you unstuck and if you want me to continue to remove your ass from the lid you need to keep that whinnying to a minimum, little boy. Just because your little backside is safe now doesn't mean I won't smack it once I get you unstuck. Stop complaining and quit squirming before I make any promises to bust your little ass. Got it?"

Sam swallowed realizing he was pushing it and that look on his dad's face read clearly that Sam's butt was not safe and would make good on his threat. "Yes, sir." Sam muttered softly feeling nervous under his dad's glaring eye. John gave his little boy one last warning look then continued with his task.

After a long moment Sam mumbled softy with an unmistakable hurt to his voice. "It's just…I hate Dean."

John paused for a moment feeling a slight ping in his heart at his son's words then almost robotically continued. John pulled his son's left thy off the seat. "Ow." Sam complained as his skin snapped back onto his body. John looked up at his son giving him a very serious look.

"That is a strong statement, young man. Do not say it so lightly. You're pissed and have every right to be, but you do not hate your brother. You are only lying to yourself and the person you're intending to hurt. Do not say things you don't mean. You are better than that."

Sam stared at his dad and felt his lip tremble slightly at his words. He dad was right he was lying. He did not hate his brother. Anything could be further from the truth.

"I want to hear a yes sir." John said firmly.

"Yes, sir." Sam mumbled as he hung his head feeling ashamed at his blatantly untrue and harsh statement. John worked on Sam other leg trying to get his left cheek extracted from the seat. It was a good long moment before Sam spoke again.

"Are you going to spank him real hard?" Sam asked sounding worried.

"Do not worry about what Dean's punishment is." John said sternly as he determinedly concentrated on his job.

"Are you gonna…use the paddle?"

John stopped once again and looked up at his youngest. He had a small wooden paddle that he had bought from a friend down in Nebraska. He had threatened to use it on his boys on a few occasions when John was at his whit's end, but it was rare that he used it. It was saved for more serious infractions. There was a few times where both his boys were on the receiving end of that "evil thing" as Dean called it. Sam had received it once for playing with John's Glock which he accidently shot a hole through the hotel wall and they had to high tail it out of there. John had to pass that Hunt to Rufus and to say the least John was not happy and his threat was along the lines of: "ENJOY THIS CAR RIDE SITTING DOWN LITTLE BOY BECAUSE WHEN WE GET TO A REST STOP I'M TAKING THAT PADDLE OUT OF THE BACK AND BRUNING YOUR ASS UNTIL YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT SITTING DOWN IS!" It was a terribly long car ride for Sam that day.

Dean on the other hand got that dreaded paddle for disobeying a direct order that almost got him killed. That was the worst paddling he had ever received from his dad and that day he not only learned not to disobey is dad, but to never _ever_ tell his dad to stop being dramatic. Dean payed dearly that night and never even spoke the word dramatic for the next few months. It has been awhile since John had threated to use it since then.

"It is none of your business how I choose to discipline your brother, young man."

"Don't use the paddle." Sam said rather quietly.

"You don't think he deserves it?" John asked curiously. He had no intention of using the paddle on Dean, but wanted to know his son's thoughts. "Only just a minute ago you were telling me you hated him and called him quite a few insulting names."

"Well no even if he is a buttmuncher asswhipe pighead dipshi…"

"Samuel!" John growled cutting him off giving him a face that Sam new all too well that if it weren't for his ass being safely stuck to the toilet it would have been smack quite a few times and none too softly either.

"Sorry…but the paddle is more for super-duper bad things, like extremely wrong things, which this was, but I'll give him a pass." Sam had no idea why he was defending his brother. He did not deserve it.

"Oh you will, will you?" John said raising an eyebrow with a dry sarcastic tone.

"Yes, sir, but spank him good." Sam said not wanting Dean to get off the hook completely. He definitely deserves a spanking.

"Samuel." John warned feeling his patience waring.

"What? He deserves it." Sam couldn't help himself as usual.

"Hey! Stop it. You are on your way to your own little ass beating if you keep it up. It is none of your concern how Dean gets punished and it is my decision as his father. You, young man, have absolutely no say in it, so stop talking about it before I take you over my knee and give you what Dean has coming too."

"Daaaaaaad, that's not fair." He was the victim here. There is no way his dad would give him a spanking. However, Sam learned never to doubt dad's threats.

"Life's not fair. You've been warned. So stop talking about Dean and focus on yourself."

"Ow." Sam complained as his other thy was peeled free from the seat. Sam skin was sensitive, sore and reddened from the pulling, prying and peeling of his poor backside. John was trying to be as careful as he could trying to free Sam from his predicament, but it was proving to be difficult. John was feeling more and more irritated at his eldest son for playing such a cruel prank on his younger brother. He was sure that Dean would never truly mean to harm his brother in any way, but the child just doesn't seem to think before he acts. He must have thought it would be a quick and funny joke that would be over in a few minutes, but that was definitely not the case and it was proving to be extremely unpleasant situation. Finally after a painful hour or so John freed Sam completely from the toilet.

Sam stood up and quickly reached for his pants and boxers that were around his ankles. John stopped his son by grabbing his arm preventing him from bending over. John stood up and rotated his son around.

"Daaaaaad." Sam complained as he flung his hands behind him covering his naked bottom. An automatic reaction embedded into his subconscious.

John rolled his eyes. His son was acting like he had never seen his naked rear end before. Without saying anything John grabbed both of his small hands in his grip and moved them out of the way so he would take a look at the damage.

Sam's bottom had a sharp crimson line that encircled his bottom and red patches of irritation where John had peeled his skin from the seat. The boy was fine he was just going to be a little tender.

As soon as John let go Sam grabbed his pants and boxers and pulled them up to their rightful place. Once dignity was restored he reached back and gave his bottom a good rub and feeling a great bitterness towards the evil culprit responsible. He was feeling embarrassed and angry at his brother and was now thinking that the paddle may not be a bad choice for the jerk.

"You're spanking him bare right?" Sam asked with resentment.

John grabbed Sam's arm spun him around landing three quick, but firm smacks to the seat of his jeans.

"Owww!" Sam whined reaching back to protect his backside.

John moved his son so that he was facing him. "What did I tell you about Dean's punishment? Huh?"

Sam looked down at the bathroom floor biting his lip. "It-it's none of my business."

"Right. And when I say it is none of your business I mean just that. So you keep your thoughts about it to yourself."

"Yes, sir." Sam muttered feeling the sting on his poor sore bottom. John grabbed his boy's chin and lifted it up so his eyes were on him.

"And one more thing, little boy. Your cussing and insulting your brother will not fly by me. I let it go with a warning this time because of what happened; you have every right to be upset, but I will not tolerate it. So consider this your only warning from here on out if I hear any more of it. You will be eating soap and you will be sporting a red behind for the night. Am I clear boy?"

Sam wanted to mention that his ass was already red, but wisely decided to keep that to himself because his dad could always decide to make it redder. So he went for self-preservation and survival instead.

"Yes, sir."

"Good. Now I want you to stay in here while I take care of your brother."

"Daaad I've been in here for hours." Sam whined not wanting to spend even one more minute in the dreadful bathroom.

"You're staying in here. I'll get you one of your books or your Walkman." Without waiting for Sam to respond John walked out of bathroom and was happy to see Dean's nose planted in the corner. Good. Although he knew without a doubt in his mind that the boy was not there the whole hour. That did not bother John as long he was there now.

John grabbed Sam's Walkman hoping it would be a good distraction. After giving Sam the Walkman and a firm look to behave and an order stay in the bathroom he walked out shutting the door as best he could behind him. John almost gowned, the door was clearly busted. John just sighed, he had more important things to take care of right now.

John marched into the bedroom area determined to put an end to eldest misplaced desire to torment his brother. Dean was going to learn some things are just not funny. Like a good Winchester ass beating which seems to take anything you thought pervious to be the stupidest idea of the century. And Dean was going to learn one way or another how stupid his prank was.

* * *

As always please review and let me know what you think!


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